Usually we think of religious wars as something happening between two nations, not between two sects in the same Hasidic section of the same neighborhood. Welcome to Holy Williamsburg! From the Broadway Triangle to Rose Plaza, to a bevy of court cases fighting over naming rights, nothing is dull among the Satmars. Even Marty Markowitz couldn't resolve this one (and Steve Levin doesn't want to). The latest event to set off the sects? Whose matzoh tastes the best.
Among the bevy of events that hipsters participate in during the year, few begin to have the annoying tone of earnestness mixed with irony. I am talking about pillow fight day, no pants subway rides, the idiotarod, and the like. This was not one of them.
Duke Riley's naval onslaught at the Queens Museum attracted museum geeks and all comers to don togas, carry tomatoes and wreck each other in an epic art battle. Even though the Brooklyn battleship was quickly and embarrassingly sacked, it proved to be one of the greatest hipster events of the past decade. Plus, anytime I get to stand shoulder to shoulder with my award winning Queens counterparts Jeremy Walsh and Willow Belden is a good day.
Everyone has their favorite Vito moment. Nearly all of them are off the record. But the best ones are when the Assemblyman is relaxed and hanging out at his beloved summer senior picnic at Sunken Meadows. The event was so momentous it had to be captured twice. Read Volume I and Volume II for a refresher course on the realities of Steve Levin and Vito's relationship. Ahhh summer memories!
The chicarron man was a treat, the Maritza-mobiles were entertaining, and we still don't know exactly how Steve Levin got Chuck Schumer to endorse him so early in the primary, but the best campaign stunt of the past year by far had to be David Yassky's four square challenge. The contest roped in a lot of innocent victims, hooked a New York Observer feature and exposed me as the talentless athletic hack that I am. Well played Taxi Man, well played.
In honor of the blog anniversary, we're going to take a look back at some of the favorite moments in the past year. Let's kick things off with the best community board running diary. There were a lot of them, from the Domino hearing to Teresa Toro's swan song, to the return of Maritza to Community Board 4... but none can top The Chairman Emeritus, Vinny Abate's swan song, which featured raucous protests from the Broadway Triangle Community Coalition, the return of Greg Hanlon, and the phrase "Jack Hammer pulled out prematurely." This will replay on AaronShortStory/Classic for the next decade.
Jack, if you're reading this, your first beer is free tomorrow night at Teddy's.
There are only twenty-four hours until we celebrate the anniversary of this blog (Tuesday night, 9 PM, Teddy's Bar, N. Eighth and Berry Street, Williamsburg) which has brought you everything from the musings of Council constituent liaisons and city agency associate staff analysts to Mieszko Kalita's riveting public safety report at Community Board 1. Despite being my guest of honor, Mieszko is bailing to do "family" stuff, so we're going to switch things up tomorrow night. Ladies and gentlemen.... Teresa Toro! By the way Brooklyn-wide community board members, you can count tomorrow as attendance for a committee meeting. I checked with your chairman/ woman and he/ she said it was cool. That means you, Ward. "Sh#t. I didn't have time to get Aaron anything. Maybe I can offer to do his taxes."
Come on out everyone! What else are you doing? Watching the women's basketball final four? There will be a TV so you won't miss it. So, if you're a regular reader of this thing, consider yourself invited. Surprise me. No outside food. No Phil DePaolo, I said gimme two up top! Not down low! We're going to have to work on this.
Happy Resurrection Williamsburg! With Easter and Passover blotting out most news this weekend, A Short Story takes a closer look at a few stories that, like the Resurrection, just keep coming back into the public discourse.
For April Fool's Day, let's keep a running tab on what stories are real and what stories aren't. Every press release that comes in is getting a couple of once-overs. Sometimes it's hard to tell.
4:45 PM (yesterday): Explosion at Allocco Recycling plant. True. Yesterday, a tank at Allocco got hit by a piece of machinery. There were minor injuries.
10:45 AM: No Underwear Subway Ride. Sounds true. Katie Sokolor is the photographer for Gothamist and she doesn't seem to be the complicit prankster type.
3:36 PM: Mayor Bloomberg sells naming rights to Ed Koch. Untrue. But Ed Koch has his own twitter account where he reviews movies. Watch Koch review Inglourious Basterds. Hope he doesn't get any ideas from this for reforming Albany.
State Senator Martin Dilan wants to wish you a happy Census Day! And mail that #### in if you haven't already. My favorite part of Census Day? The Census bling. Get on down to Borough Hall this afternoon to pick up your disposable alarm clock, key chains, wrist bands, pedometers, glow-in-the-dark swizzle sticks and assault whistle, all courtesy of the US Census.
It's hard to believe that it has been a year already. What better way to celebrate the anniversary of this blog than a multi-borough Greco-Roman naval fight at the Queens Museum? Wait, someone already did that? Damnit. What if we just get everybody together next Tuesday and head over to Teddy's at 9 PM. That sound good to you? By the way, you're all invited.
A Short Story! One Year Anniversary of This Blog Doing Stuff! Teddy's Bar and Grill North Eighth Street and Berry Street 9 PM Featuring Jack Hammer! Juliet Linderman! Beyonce! And Borough President Marty Markowitz's non-unionized Polish equivalent, Mieszko Kalita!
Put that book down and get over there! Or we'll make you part of an uncompensated performance art project.
*There's more to come from Monday's Conselyea Street building collapse, as MyFoxNY interviewed Buildings Commissioner LiMandri about it. He didn't say very much that he had already said on Monday. But there are updates to the story on the Brooklyn Paper as well as at Curbed and the AP has a video:
*Sal Gentile at City Hall News feeds the fires of rampant speculation regarding who would replace Brooklyn District Attorney Charles Hynes were he to not seek reelection in 2013 or... gasp!... pass away before then. The leading pre-candidates are Assemblyman Jim Brennan and States Attorney Loretta Lynch, but guess whose name crops up here? You guessed it. David Yassky. That's three points for Andy Campbell's fantasy league. *Speaking of Andy, above, he finally went to Shag to get his maleness cast in plaster. For a story. I'm serious. You can read the story here.
Finally, Steve Witt has a great story coming out this week where an officer in the 67th Precinct was honored after shooting a would-be machete-wielding assailant in the leg. I believe we have video.
William Kentridge's production of The Nose ended last night at The Metropolitan Opera, which I was fortunate enough to see. In one critical scene in the second act, the main character enters a newspaper office to request an advertisement for his missing nose. The editor rejects him, saying, if he put the ad in, people would want to put in all sorts of ads for missing body parts into the paper. Then he offers for a writer to write about the unusual story for a small fee.
The point is that papers are selective in what they print, but crazy stories that people can relate to are always a good bet. I think. Also, people with missing noses that become state councilors will eventually confront such nose in an epic Russian mob beat-down, or so the opera tells me.
The point is... there are a number of stories this past week where a reporter has had to follow his or her nose to get at what is really going on. Let's recognize them in a special, nose-themed edition of The Short List.
*How did the press buy the Lazar/ Hikind hype when Greenfield stuck by the party apparatus and walloped the opposition in a relatively easy victory. Maybe because county isn't dead. Or maybe it was because Greenfield was simply a better candidate, as Yeshiva World argues. Or maybe Vito Lopez is the Duke University Blue Devils and pundits should stop betting against him in Brooklyn races. *Let's back up to Wednesday to mention a local blogger with a good nose for a story. Miss Heather at New York Shitty probably knows more about hostels in Williamsburg and Greenpoint than anyone (and that's including its elected officials who were not aware of the two hostels on North 6th and several others scattered around the neighborhood before Friday's raid). She sniffed out a story on Wednesday about the glove factory and was ahead of the news curve when it broke in another location on Friday. Not to mention the fiasco on Eagle Street from earlier this summer. Disagree with me if you like, but these buildings stories are what Miss Heather is best at. Updated: Assemblymember Joe Lentol's office has been quietly collecting information about hostels in Northside Williamsburg and Greenpoint for several months. Lentol was the first official to put out a statement about the raid, expressing sympathy for the long-term tenants of the hostel that was evicted on Friday.
*You may need to hold your nose if you walk on parts of the Gowanus Canal, but don't miss the debut of Characters of Gowanus on Vimeo. It's like surfing the Canal from the safety of your computer, but you should still take a shower afterward. Check out their interview with the Gowanus Canal Swamp Thing! *Finally, music snobs, turn your nose up at the DIY Music festival if you must, but the spirit is refreshing and willing, so check it out because there isn't a ton going on this weekend except for basketball. Actually, there might be, so click on the Weekly Culture Picks to see more.
Damn you Cornell! I briefly switched my support to the scrappy Ivy underdog and look what happened. Big Red craps the bed. Thanks Michael Hanson. I believed. For a few minutes. And look where it got us. At least people have finally heard of Cornell.
Council candidate Joe Lazar poses next to his campaign.
It's been several days since I did some links and a lot has happened this week from storm surges, to political campaigns to Ray Kelly bowling in Williamsburg for some reason. Let's look at six well-written stories that deserve a second look, as well as a few gold stars for some electric posting.
*More Greenfield-Lazar coverage, which is riveting the political chattering classes. The Times' Kareem Fahim has the play by play and The Courier's Steve Witt gets a gold star for his gut instincts. According to Steve, he showed up at Lazar's afterparty first, which was held in a catering hall in Boro Park only it was vacant and there was no food. Steve immediately assumed without looking at the poll numbers that Greenfield pulled the upset and headed over to his Ocean Avenue headquarters. Sure enough, he was right. Half the Brooklyn delegation showed up including Steve Levin, and there was a decent spread too. And that's A Short Story's news gut call of the week. David Greenfield won despite looking like Sy Abelman in A Serious Man
*My last gold star goes out to Brian Ries at Free Williamsburg who has been blogging his brains out this week on Williamsburg Walks, the DIY Music Festival, and my favorite, the campaign to get broadband internet to North Brooklyn. Not only did he get the story right, he got the f#cking graphic right. Jim Carrey circa Cable Guy. Brilliant, dude. Let's drop the Carrey skying over Jack Black video in here just for Brian. Be sure to clean up the glass.
